Depression

C admitted to me yesterday that he's depressed too. He's just so homesick. I get it. It's been tough for him being away from all of us for so long. We even planned on meeting this weekend for Labor Day but that got cancelled. He's not allowed to leave the base because he's considered a student. I was going to visit him even though it was a seven hour car ride with two kids but that's no longer possible either. The hotel on base is already booked for the long weekend. I was looking forward to finally seeing him again. The last time I saw him was June 23, three days after our wedding.

Even though C told me that he's depressed, I couldn't admit to the same. I've always had a hard time confiding in others about my depression. It's just so personal. Besides, he doesn't really need to know. There's nothing he could do. It would just make him worry.

I confided in C about my depression before, when we first started dating. Back then, he said he didn't believe in depression. I guess he thought by double digit suicide attempts were my way of having fun? I'm not sure. I'm glad he changed his belief. It took a lot to make him realize. He helped me recover from my last attempt. He watched me throw up blood. One of his best friends was recently hospitalized for a suicide attempt too. Now my poor C is experiencing depression himself. Life seems to have a cruel sense of humor.