So Tired

My days are busy, as all mothers' are. It seems like there are never enough hours in the day to get done with everything I need to. Just yesterday I tried to knock shower, A's bath, and iron work clothes off my to do list. Even that kept me up past 11 pm! I still haven't filed for child support, studied for the CPA ethics exam, clean out my purse, rebuild G's bed, and that pile of laundry is getting big enough that it'll rejoin my list soon enough. Usually I would work on a lot of these things tomorrow (Fridays are half-days at work) but I already have to stop by DEERS and get my military ID done so A and I will finally have insurance.

I just want a night off. A night to finally sleep! I stay up past 10 pm every night even though I have to wake up for work at 5 am. I could do that schedule easy if I was able to stay asleep that whole time. But no. I'm up with A two to three times in those few short hours. I don't even get to sleep for four hours straight. I don't know how much longer I can do this.

This would be the perfect opportunity for a husband/ boyfriend/ anyone to step up and save me. Anyone? No? Oh, that's right, I chose to go through this alone. I could've stayed single and pursued a boyfriend who would be here to help with the kids. I could've given up my career to follow C where ever the Marines send him. Instead, I'm here alone because I want to have it all. I want to take care of my kids so they can grow to be happy and healthy. I want a career I can be proud of that also pays the bills. I want to be with the man I love and have loved since high school. I want the man I love to be happy and satisfied with his career. I want to spare G and A the trauma of moving from house to house growing up. Like I said: I want it all, even if it pushes me to the brink of exhaustion to pursue it all.